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| MUSLIM NEWS 2 3 4...............BEHEADING VIDEOS (DANIEL PEARL et al) RETURN TO HOMEPAGE
During his trip Carter traveled from the Westbank to Damascus and into Egypt meeting with Hamas terrorist leaders Mahmoud al-Zahar, Saeed Seyam and exiled killer KALID MESHAAL. Carter's meet-and-greets were hosted by Syrian strongman Bashar al-Assad and Egyptian dictator Hosni Mubarak. Warned repeatedly by the Whitehouse and the U.S. Department of State not to undertake his unauthorized mission, Carter thumbed his nose at federal law and went anyway. Representative Sue Myrick (R-NC) has called publically for Mr. Carter's passport revocation. Others on both sides of the aisle have even called for prosecuting The Georgia Peanut under the 1799 LOGAN ACT, last amended in 2004. § 953. Private correspondence with foreign governments. Any citizen of the United States, wherever he may be, who, without authority of the United States, directly or indirectly commences or carries on any correspondence or intercourse with any foreign government or any officer or agent thereof, with intent to influence the measures or conduct of any foreign government or of any officer or agent thereof, in relation to any disputes or controversies with the United States, or to defeat the measures of the United States, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than three years, or both.
And in the meanwhile, your SOLDIERS, MARINES, AIRMEN, SAILORS and SPOOKS are killing the muslim-terrorists as you sit fat-dumb-and-lazy playing video games. The War On Terror is NOT a godamned video game! It was a simple decision by the volatile Shiite cleric since ALL of his fighters are either hiding inside mosques with the women or dead. For the third time in three years the Iraqi Defense Forces wiped out al-Sadr's MOOKIE al-Sadr periodically recruits a few hundred young shiites to play army. They always get killed by the Iraqi Forces and don't get even a single virgin. Ref: LOOTERS OF ISLAM
The Holy Qu'ran, Torah and Bible all agree to this end-time scenario, with only the names of the players on separate scorecards. London based Muslim scholar Inayat Bunglawala told Alien Nation Report today, "Moqtada al-Sadr, Hassan Nasrallah, Bashar al-Assad, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and Osama bin-Laden should watch for the LION. These despots have raped the peaceful ancient faith of Islam and will pay not only with their heads but their everlasting souls." Allahu Akbar! Shalom! Praise The Lord!
In the video Gadahn called for the death of George Bush and promised mass murder for all who deny Allah and the Islamic Way. He claimed Al-Qaeda has defeated America even though he admitted virtually all Al-Qaeda fighters are either dead or AWOL. He ended the video tirade with his wedding invitation. Leading democrats in Washington hailed the video as thought-provoking and courageous. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) told Alien Nation Report stringer Brian Wells, "We should listen to this young man. He clearly understands the danger his religion is facing from the Bush regime. Our troops have killed all of his friends!" Pelosi refused comment on attending the terrorist's nuptials.
He converted to Islam in 1995 and was recruited in 2003 by Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, who earlier this year confessed to the brutal beheading of Wall Street journalist DANIEL PEARL. Thought to be hiding in Pakistan, Shazzam al-Amriki - Adam Pearlman - was placed on the FBI's Most Wanted Terrorist list. The reward for his capture now stands at over 2 million dollars. Reference: WARNING! VIEW DANIEL PEARL BEHEADING VIDEO Called Teddy Mo' by the local Islamic press, the bear was taken from his home in Bohiti Province by radical muslim clerics and strung up from the mast of the District's only remaining water taxi. A crowd said to number in the hundreds could be heard chanting, " However, a BBC camera crew on scene told late arriving UN peacekeeping troops that the crowd was actually watching a nearby gang-rape rather than the lynching of Teddy Mo'. Gibbons, 54 , from Liverpool had been in the Sudan just four months teaching math at Bohiti Province Unity High School. As a group project she brought a teddy bear to class and asked the students to name it. Mohammad was suggested and 20 of the 23 students voted yes, which led to a firestorm in this largely muslim enclave. Clerics demanded the teacher's death. The teddy bear was placed under house arrest. Gibbons was eventually taken into custody convicted and sentenced to 15 days in prison and 40 lashes on charges of insulting Islam. Although Mohammad is a common name for boys it is considered a crime under Sharia Law to ascribe it to animals. Especially stuffed animals. The true name of Islam's prophet is actually MUhammad but the MO version is accepted throughout the radical Muslim world, as is Mohammed and Mohamed. Mohyomomma is favored throughout Africa while Muhamabuda is widely accepted in Indonesia, the Phillipines and Malaysia.
"I have great respect for the Islamic religion and would not knowingly offend anyone. I am sorry if I caused any distress," Gibbons told Alien Nation Report stringer Brian Peppers today, "but I gotta tell 'ya...those nutty negroes actually think they're muslim. The whole goddamned country is crazier than a rabid herd of shithouse rats!" Reference: A LOGICAL ANSWER TO MILITANT SHARIA LAW?
"When we find 'em, we hang 'em," Ahmadinejad told the UN Assembly today, "homosexuality is a microbe disease that must be driven out before the Mahdi arrives." Dinky is a devout 'Twelver'.
The out-of-the closet Ahmadinejad opens and closes all his speeches imploring the Mahdi - also called the Hidden Imam - to give him strength to create a worldwide bloodbath. Dinky calls himself The Chosen. Terrorism experts claim Ahmadinejad's quest for nuclear weapons is driven by his religious zealotry. Reference: MAHDI
Ahmadinejad was reportedly taking in the local Big Apple scene with his life-partner ahead of a scheduled hate-speech before the UN today. Reference: TERRORISTS Rumors have swirled around Ahmadinejad since his recent ugly and painfully public break-up with Syrian leader Bashar al-Assad. Al-Assad was said to be frustrated by Dinky's bestiality, bisexualism and penchant for poodles. Assad refused comment.
Ahmadinejad and his entourage engaged in a brief struggle with an unidentified New York Times photographer but no arrests were made. " Walls has experienced little objection to his theory. Leading archeologists, geneticists and natural scientists agree with Walls that man probably originated in the so-called 'Cradle of Life' in North Africa. The long held Darwinian concept is rarely disputed.
"You must understand," Dr. Yamini al-Sadr a University of Libya spokesarab told ANR, "the Qu'ran teaches us that most certainly jews are monkeys not warriors for Allah." Walls has heard it all before in several languages. "What the religious scholars and the scientists can't come to grips with is simple," Walls said, "Jews and Muslims all come from the same source. Terrorists DO NOT!" Reference: National Geographic
The former Tool Time handyman is shown on the video gesturing wildly and throwing darts at a picture of George W. Bush. Karn is overheard saying, "Well fuck-all! We just had to blow up the bridge named 35W.....Dubya.....geet eet?" Karn's accent sounds forced. In a related story Alien Nation Report has learned that just before retiring to a month long hiatus, Congressional leaders Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) and Harry Reid (D-NV) submitted legislation calling for the distribution of absentee ballots for the '08 election to Al-Qaeda members worldwide. They also plan to subpoena Department of Transportation Secretary Mary E. Peters over 35W.
Terror-Dollars are flowing into the Obama and Clinton campaigns, according to Homeland Security e-mail wiretaps. Dick Cheney is on the case. Reference: LOSING BIN-LADEN AND OTHER CLINTON CRIMES " The director/writer of such anti-American films as PLATOON, BORN ON THE FOURTH OF JULY and JFK, Stone surprised critics with his new docudrama. The working title is BUFFOON. President 'Dinky' Ahmadinejad happily posed for publicity stills and was said to be a gracious host during Stone's visit to the presidential palace last week, even providing beluga caviar. ANR has learned Ahmadinejad is crushed by the news from Hollywood and Stone's proposed film project.
Indeed a recent National Geographic study suggests that if man is descended from monkeys then - and STONE agrees - it most surely began with Ahmadinejad's direct-blooded ancestors.
Al-Zawahiri released a video last week extolling the efforts of Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) in their attempts to secure an American defeat in Iraq. He met with them Sunday to ink the binding agreement. Out of fear Pelosi refused comment but Reid couldn't shut up. ANR interview excerpts with Reid: ".....I don't care what ABC says about the video, Dr. al-Zawahiri is a brilliant man and I trust him.....No No, Al-Qaeda is not plotting against U.S. assets in Iraq.....I believe we can negotiate peace with the FREEDOM FIGHTERS.....Yes they are freedom fighters not terrorists, afterall, WE invaded THEIR homes without just cause.....Again, in the VIDEO Dr. al-Zawahiri is NOT mocking me.....George Bush should be shot, er , IMPEACHED....." Calls for Reid's resignation have fallen on deaf ears of the Lapdog Media. Whitehouse officials confirmed for ANR that President Bush has ordered the NSA to block all HAMAS internet child videos. A New York Times editorial today claimed George W. Bush hates muslims and his unwillingness to concede defeat in the War On Terror fuels future terrorist attacks on the U.S. Homeland, Disney Land, Disney World and Bixby, Oklahoma. Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi told ANR today, "
Muhammad denies he flew on a magic-camel from MECCA to Florida thus reducing his worthless carbon footprint. Former Vice-President Al Gore has reportedly huddled with Muhammad to create a new religion. Muhammad has refused ANR phone calls regarding THE 1st CHURCH OF GORASIM.
Alien Nation Report has learned that al-Masri is still alive but missing integral parts of his manhood. Cancel his 72 virgins Allah! ( VIEW classified CIA photo above ) The inept successor to terrorist leader Abu Musab al-Zargawi has maintained a low profile in Iraq. Al-Masri's reticence to show himself forced U.S. strategists to employ more creative tactics.
"The operation is easy enough," MSGT. Ed Galvin told ANR, "under cover of darkness we snatch the most prized love-goats from Al-QAEDA camps throughout Iraq and send them to Ramadi for retro-fitting with rear entry munitions........just a small amount of C-4 with pressure sensitive triggers." Only Islamagoats are requisitioned. MSGT. Galvin then explained that the IEG's are redeployed to the Al-Qaeda harem-herds and it becomes a waiting game. "Oh yeah! Then all we have to do is wait for the ba-baa-baaaa! and the BOOM!" MSGT. Galvin said, "that's when we know we got one."
Upon hearing a rumor that Syrian terrorist leader Bashar al-Assad hosted U.S. Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi during an Easter holiday tryst, Mookie reportedly went wild in a 'jilted lover' rampage ( photo left ). "He even shot his cat Nasrallah then stomped on the poor thing while cursing...we think...FUCK-YOU...in Spanish...," an al-Sadr aide told Alien Nation Report stringer Laura Engalls today. Mookie's anger is legend. STORY BELOW Rumors have circulated from tent to tent throughout the Arab world for years that Iran's Dinky Ahmadinejad, Syria's Bashar al-Assad, Lebanon's Hassan Nasrallah and Mookie have been playing house. CIA Middle East expert Asswan al-Bastardi told Engalls, "While gay love is frowned upon in Islam it remains a don't ask-don't tell sort of thing. Besides these are very powerful men." The Bush Administration refused comment for this story but an insider told ANR, "Intel briefings on this crew are MORE than entertaining!" Captured home-movies of the four are reportedly in CIA hands. Democrat leaders in the House are scrambling to issue subpoenas alleging violation of the CUATRO AMIGO'S rights. The Department of Homeland Security ( DHS ) denies ANY wrong doing citing Patriot Act protocol and national security considerations. While homosexuality is frowned upon by The Infallible Holy Twelve Imams, gay and camel sex is a 'don't ask, don't tell' proposition in most Arab countries. Rumors of the affair have been rampant for months, but recent disclosures by a confidant of Hezbollah leader Nasrallah spilled the story onto the 'Arab Street' yesterday. "I am dismayed at this news....not that there's anything wrong with it," a Lebanese monkey vendor told ANR stringer Laura Engalls. Engalls is in Beirut covering U.S. evacuations from that war torn city. When asked if the rumors were true Nasrallah replied, "Well of course. Dinky (Ahmadinejad) and Assboy (Al-Assad) are dear friends. We are the three mouskateers." When asked if he meant musketeers, Nasrallah replied: "No. Don't you think Assboy looks like a cute little meerkat with that long neck and twinkling eyes?"
The TWELFTH IMAM named Muhammad al-Mahdi disappeared centuries ago during his father's home-going. Shi'a legend holds that when al-Mahdi returns the world will end. The most popular account of Muhammad al-Mahdi in Shi'a literature is taken from his father's funeral. It is reported that as prayer was about to begin, Muhammad al-Mahdi's uncle, Jafar ibn Ali approached to lead the assembly. However, Muhammad al-Mahdi rushed from the crowd and commanded, "Move aside, uncle; only an Imam can lead the funeral prayer of an Imam." Jafar stood back, and the five-year-old child delivered flawlessly the last rites for his father. According to Shi'a faith, at that very moment Muhammad al-Mahdi disappeared and went into ghaybat, or occultation. Ahmadinejad has long been obsessed with al-Mahdi and when news of the TWELFTH IMAM'S return began circulating throughout the muslim world, Mahmoud 'Dinky' Ahmadinejad went undercover posing as a little boy in hopes of wooing the child prophet ( photo above ). An Iranian intelligence officer who wished to remain anonymous told ANR today, "Mahmoud is not only a pedophile....he is quite insane. The Iranian people have enough trouble without his perverted foolishness!" "If Dinky Ahmadinejad denies the Holocaust then we reserve the right to deny his religious icon....this so-called prophet Muhammad," Rabbi Alon Shagra Goldstein told ANR today. Palestinian Authority president Mahmoud Abbas is slated to speak at the conference ( photo above ). Middle-East political and religious experts say the Abbas speech could ignite civil war throughout the region. "Some say he was a real man and others claim Muhammad was just a cartoon character," Rabbi Goldstein said, "we feel he was the latter and the very FIRST urban legend." The MUHAMMAD DIDN'T HAPPEN CONFERENCE is slated to begin Christmas day. According to the New York Times, delegates from around the Western World are expected to attend under strict security measures. Jimmy Carter has reportedly refused his invitation. Echoing the irrational rant ( see MUSLIM NEWS ) of his pal Iranian lunatic Mahmoud 'Dinky' Ahmadinejad, Annan labeled Bush 'The Great Satan'. He refused to take any responsibility for the dismal performance of the UN during his watch. Annan again denied his involvement in the Iraqi 'Food For Oil' scandal once more throwing his own son under the bus. Read what the Kansas City Star has to say about Annan below: The farewell address of UN Secretary-General Kofi Annan was a plea for shared global values and multilateralism — sentiments with which few would quibble. Agreed: The world needs an effective world body to mitigate problems and negotiate disputes. Annan’s address drew welcome international attention to the Truman Presidential Museum and Library where it was delivered. Annan chose the library in Independence because of Truman’s major role in the founding of the United Nations. President Bush was never mentioned in the secretary-general’s text, but Truman was praised frequently for his far-sighted leadership and his attention to international concerns. Yet Annan’s address betrayed little recognition that on his watch, the U.N.’s stature sank. On his watch, even the U.N.’s own employee union adopted a resolution of no confidence in senior management. Annan mentioned perhaps the U.N.’s finest moment: When it authorized a military response to North Korea’s invasion of the South. Yet that action took place only because the Soviet delegate was not present to cast the expected veto. Russia remains a problem today as the international community tries to address concerns like dangerous Iranian weapons programs. China, France and other prominent members of the United Nations also routinely undermine effective international action. So it was a bit jarring to hear Annan once again focus on U.S. faults. He said that when the United States 'appears to abandon its own ideals and objectives, its friends abroad are naturally troubled and confused.' Answering questions later, he denied he was criticizing Washington, but the message was clear enough. Annan leaves office Dec. 31 with the institution he served more tarnished than when he took the job. For the good of the U.N., it is to be hoped his successor, Ban Ki-moon of South Korea, enjoys far greater success. - Kansas City Star editorial A Pentagon source told ANR today, "The unit is believed to be at least battalion strength and comprised of the best and brightest Iran has to offer." ( see And in a disturbing developement, UN analysts say Ahmadinejad now believes that he is the so-called Twelfth Imam and has been sent to earth charged with unleashing Armageddon. Experts fear Dinky is set on destroying mankind in a worldwide conflagration ( see ARCHIVES link column left ). Dinky has even ordered construction of a road from the well, into which the 12th Imam fell centuries ago, leading directly to the Iranian Presidential Palace. Ahmadinejad is reportedly lining the Palace with tin-foil so that he will survive the coming holocaust of his own creation. "He's quite mad you know," outgoing UN Secretary General Kofi Annan told ANR today, "sandmonkeys with automatic weapons! Ridiculous!" "Well we are just thrilled to receive this great honor," Al-Jazeera international production manager Ali bin-Gholli told ANR today, "especially coming on the heels of our english-version network launch recently in America." ANR story at ARCHIVES link left Unlike their counterparts in Hollywood, the al-Oscars will have limited categories. Of course the suspense will be reserved for the coveted There will be just two other al-Oscars awarded for individual performances ( Best Actor and Best Terrorist in a Supporting Role ). The remaining al-Oscars will be distributed among terrorist groups for organization, production standards, audio / video clarity and Best ALLAH AKHBAR ! Chanters. Terrorist group finalists include: In Iraq: Ansar Al-Islam To preview nominated performances go to BEHEADINGS link column left. As with the American Oscars this is ADULT content! Newly elected House Speaker NANCY PELOSI and her lap dog 'Baghdad' Jack Murtha have been tapped by Al- Jazeera to serve as al-Oscar presenters. Murtha reportedly is not 'comfortable' with the arrangement until he gets to know AL- JAZEERA and America's enemies better. ANR readers will recall the ABSCAM scandal that Murtha found himself in long years back. As an unindicted co-conspirator Badhdad Jack was caught on tape refusing a bribe from FBI agents until, 'I work with you guys awhile and get to know you better'. Sticking to the Democrat's worn-out talking points Al-Zawahiri belittled the Bush Administration's prosecution of the 'War On Terror'. He even accused Bush of, among other things familiar to the Democrats; rigging elections, failure to provide health care, illegal wire-tapping and killer hurricanes. Sounding for all the world exactly like Nancy Pelosi, Jack Murtha, Harry Reid and the New York Times, al-Zawahiri said Bush is a failure. He then pleaded with U.S. voters to go Democrat in November. DNC chairman Howard Dean screamed in glee. Al-Zawahiri was speaking from a cave in Pakistan. To understand who the real failure is read ANR stringer Laura Engalls' interview below ( translation by Dr. Franklin Sabat ): ENGALLS: Mr. al-Zawahiri where do you currently reside?  TEHRAN (ANR Sept. 29) - Iranian president Mahmoud 'Dinky' Ahmadinejad today publicly prayed for the apocalyptic return of Muhammad Timmy al- Mahdi, the so-called Twelfth Imam. In the 13th Century, at age 5, al-Mahdi tragically fell down a well. Since Lassie hadn't been born yet, al-Mahdi's body was never found. In an age-progression sketch ANR forensic cartoonist John Booth shows what al-Mahdi looks like today ( see above). In his press conference today Ahmadinejad threatened to kill himself if al-Mahdi, 'doesn't show up soon' (photo right). No one believed him. Western analysts contend that Dinky is neurotic and regularly threatens suicide with his finger. In fact just last week Dinky threatened to shoot Hassan Nasrallah's cat. Recognizing an unloaded finger, the cat bit Dinky on his dinky then fainted from uncontrolled laughter. After viewing the video, House minority leader Nancy Pelosi called for understanding and tolerance telling Alien Nation Report stringer Laura Engalls: "The poisonous rhetoric of the Bush Administration has driven fine young Sandmonkeys out of their caves and incited them to commit numerous alleged acts of violence." While the Western media describes 'infidel' as the Jewish State, the Islamafacists roll onto their camel's honey-hole laughing loudly, "EVERYONE but me is an infidel!" Radical muslim parents cite the noble QUR'AN Mullah spokesmonkey Ali bin-Gholli told ANR, "Well fuck all! This bunny pest is not welcomed on Persian soil. We deny women are attractive or good for anything other than stoning!" Hefner told ANR today he hopes to be up and running in time for this year's Ramadan holiday and fasting contests. "Contruction was completed on the club facilities last month," Hefner said, "and we have selected the most beautiful Persian women in Iran to staff the operation." The Iranian strongman-wannabe immediately agreed to UN nuclear talks in exchange for the photos. But ANR obtained this exclusive story through a confidential source with the New York Times that is blackmailing the CIA over sex claims of her own. According to the NYT source (Valerie Plame), Karr spent several months in Tehran as the guest of Ahmadinejad. The two enjoyed 'experimental sex'. CLICK HERE for classified photos. But the surgery went horribly wrong, Karr pitched a hissy fit and Ahmadinejad's bitch, Hezbollah leader Hassan Nasrallah, demanded the American be deported. Karr was herded onto an al-Iran Airways jet (cattle class) to Thailand. Dinky wept. According to the unnamed operative bin-Laden succumbed to kidney failure following a bout with typhoid fever. U.S. military authorities in Afghanistan are tight-lipped about the Saudi intel, but ANR has learned that Coalition Forces on the border with Pakistan have been sending wave after wave of low-level helicopter night-ops throughout the PESHAWAR region where bin-Laden was believed hiding. And today the French government is calling for an investigation into Taliban allegations of bio-terror employed by U.S. forces. Typhoid is caused by the Salmonella Typhi bacillus and spread by human feces contamination in water and/or food. There are huge stockpiles of S. Typhi throughout the Middle East. Overheard on the NSA tape is Taliban general Ali bin-Sharif (above left) and Iraqi Al-Qaeda terrorist Mahmoud Zawahili (above right). NSA# BAT - 21 CENTCOM Alpha Secure 091106. BIN-SHARIF: Yes hello my friend Mahmoud....I can hear you. We are fine here in the fortress of Allah. The stupid Americans have been spraying for mosquitos these past weeks. They care about us (laughs) they want our children to be free of sickness. ZAWAHILI: You stupid camel's ass! The Americans are not spraying FOR mosquitos....they are spraying WITH mosquitos! The infidels have infected you ALL with shit and just today blew up my brand new '68 Toyota Corolla! They have killed Osama! BIN-SHARIF: Holy Shiite! Then we must blame the Bush for using WMD's...agreed? ZAWAHILI: Agreed! |
CAIRO, EGYPT (ANR Apr. 21) - Failed former U.S. president Jimmy Peanuthead Carter wound up his nine day study mission to the volatile Middle-East today claiming he has, "...broken through the wall of sectarian hatred and formed a more perfect union in the region that will benefit terrorists and my sagging legacy..."
Resisting the growing clamor to perp-walk Carter, Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice told Alien Nation Report stringer Laura Engalls today, "We don't have time to prosecute a shriveled-up old bastard like Carter....(gesturing)....his legacy is shorter and as worthless as his pecker." 
MOSUL (ANR Apr. 9) - The muslim version of Jeremiah Wright, Moqtada al-Sadr has again called his Mehdi Army fighters off the streets of central Baghdad .
The Lion of Judah has its origins in the Book of Genesis of the Hebrew Bible - Old Testament - where the Israelite tribe of Judah had the lion as its symbol. In Christendom The Lion Of Judah embodies the Christ Jesus as a returning warrior in the End Days, come to kill SATAN in a great apocalypse.
ISLAMABAD (ANR Jan 11) - After releasing a forty-five minute hate rant on Youtube.com yesterday, the so called American Al-Qaeda Adam Gadahn - ALIAS: Azzam Yahiye al-Amriki - gleefully invited viewers to attend his wedding slated for April in a yet undisclosed Pakistani location. Reference: Happy couple above
Born to Jewish parents and raised on a goat farm in California, Gadahn's real name is Adam Pearlman.
KHARTOUM (ANR Dec 6) - Just four days after British teacher Gillian Gibbons was paroled from a Sudanese jail, the teddy bear she named Mohammad has been hanged by an angry mob.
Teddy Mo' is said to have suffered in silence during his house arrest. The very moment Gibbon's arrived safely back in Britain, the mob stormed his home and the tragedy unfolded. - See Photo Right
(NEW YORK Sept 26) - After assuring a concerned Columbia University audience Monday - There are no homosexuals in Iran - President Mahmoud 'Dinky' Ahmadinejad took his show to the United Nations.
Twelvers make up 80% of the muslim Shi'ah sect and believe international war must be triggered before the Twelfth Imam or Mahdi will return to spread peace on Earth.
NEW YORK (ANR Sept 25) - Iranian president and spineless Islamic backslider Mahmoud 'DINKY' Ahmadinejad was snapped by local paparazzi enjoying the show in Manhattan's notorious VIP Club yesterday. - View Photo Left 
Known in Tehran only as 'Yousef The Gay Goat' Dinky's lover has so far eluded the prying eyes of a ratings-starved Western Press. -Photo Right
PARIS (ANR Aug 12) - By analyzing DNA from people in all reqions of the world, geneticist Dr. Seth Walls believes that radical islamic terrorists evolved from sand apes 60,000 years ago.
But many find it ethically difficult to separate terrorist from normal men, maintaining that wanton murder is cultural not genetic. A duty many say.
MINNEAPOLIS (ANR Aug.6) - In a video released today, American Al-Qaeda leader Richard Karn - aka : Al Borland from Home Improvement - claimed responsibility for the bridge disaster in Minnesota, "Yes by God we deed eet!"( Photo above )
A spokesterrorist told ANR today, "His Majesty Ahmadinejad has often spoken to the fact that jews are monkeys and takes great offense at Mr. Stone's portrayal." - Ref: photo right 
MOSUL (ANR May 1) - Abu Ayyub al-Masri - Arabic translation: Goat Spoiler- has been gravely wounded by U.S. Special Operations east of Baghdad today.
Enter the IEG (Improvised Explosive Goat). The tactic is simple and effective against all muslim terrorists the world over.
BAGHDAD (ANR Apr. 13) - Speaking from a safe-house in Iran, gay lunatic Muqtada 'Mookie' al-Sadr has ordered all TWO of his remaining FIGHTERS to attack U.S. Forces in Iraq.
BEIRUT (ANR July 24) - In what could prove embarrassing to the entire Muslim world, Alien Nation Report has learned that Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Syrian president Bashar al-Assad and Hezbollah terrorist Sayyad Hassan Nasrallah have been carrying on a homosexual 
Ahmadinejad and Al-Assad refused comment but Hassan Nasrallah couldn't shut up. He told Engalls that he has already beheaded the source of the leak and is 'saddened' by the betrayal (photo right).
TEL-AVIV (ANR Dec. 20) - In a stinging rebuke to Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad's International Conference On The Holocaust, a group of Rabbis today announced a conference of their own. Former president Jimmy Carter's latest book in conjunction with Iran's holocaust denials has fueled Jewish rage (interview right ).
The debate has raged for centuries from tent-to-tent and cave-to-cave regarding the tale of Prophet Muhammad, Sunni vs. Shia ( drawing right ).
NEW YORK (ANR Nov. 28) - Alien Nation Report has learned that Iranian President Mahmoud ( Dinky ) Ahmadinejad has fielded a 'Special-Ops' unit intended for duty on American soil.
TEHRAN (ANR Nov. 19) - The terrorist mouthpiece Al-Jazeera Television News Network has been selected to host the al-Oscar Islamic Motion Picture Academy Awards.
NEW YORK (ANR Sept. 30) - Following the direction of Democrat Party leadership, Al-Qaeda number two man Ayman al-Zawahiri today denounced President Bush and U.S. Forces in Afghanistan and Iraq (photo left).
Ahmadinejad claims he was 'directed by Allah to pave the way for the glorious appearance of the Mahdi'.
Following the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad, Islamafascists throughout the world are raising their children to hate the infidel.
TEHRAN (ANR Sept. 17) - Unaccustomed to any challenge to their authority, Iran's ruling Mullahs today broke into tears after learning Playboy publishing mogul Hugh Hefner plans to open a club in Tehran.
LOS ANGELES (ANR Aug. 23) - In a bizarre twist to the ongoing JonBenet Ramsey murder saga, Alien Nation Report has learned that admitted killer John Mark Karr engaged in a torrid homosexual affair with Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. CIA operatives confronted Ahmadinejad with photos last week.
Karr was invited to Iran to select a choice virgin under that country's You Pick 'Em We Change 'Em make-over program. Iranian scientists have reportedly developed a surgical procedure to transform little arab girls into anything the paying client desires. Karr desired a JonBenet.
ISLAMABAD (ANR Sept. 26) - A Saudi Intelligence Services operative told Alien Nation Report today that Al-Qaeda leader and U.S. Public Enemy #1 Osama bin-Laden is dead.
Meanwhile, the New York Times has leaked the partial transcript of a NSA satellite eavesdrop-surveillance from the operational area.